YGA 15 | Sisterhood

Women should empower each other, push each other to the top, and not let their sisterhood down. On today’s episode of the Your Goddess Awakened Show, I’m discussing the importance of sisterhood, of coming together and helping each other. When you see a woman who’s struggling, you should be ready to give a hand, regardless of skin color, class, or background. It’s important to remind ourselves that while we have grown into the masculine principles we are used to, women should come together as one and fight for what is right for every woman in the world.

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Full transcription of the show is below:

Welcome to another episode. This one is about all of us women and what we can do to support each other more than we have been. Even if you think of yourself as being completely compassionate and a wonderful friend and I’m sure that you are, we see online that a lot of us are not being supportive of the sisterhood. When I say that, I mean the other women in our lives and in our world even if we don’t know them. What starts to happen is there’s a fair amount of danger that we will delay the good and the coming back of the goddess and that energy of that circle by being too much in the masculine principles that we have all grown up with and been trained to follow along with.

I’ll give you an example, not my favorite person in the world but I have deep compassion for her at the moment, Melania Trump. She has been raised in an environment where it is certain that she has been invited into believing in herself as a sex symbol whose value is in her looks and as arm candy. She is not valued for her brain. I don’t know whether she has much of a brain or not. It’s not the point. I read an article that talked about the fact that there was somebody who knew them was saying there’s more in it for her to stay than go. This is where this compassionate piece comes from. I was thinking, “What an awful choice to be given to stay with this odious human being. From many of the pictures that I’ve seen, she doesn’t seem to care for him at all or to go out into this vast unknown where she would be asked to stand on her own two feet.” To not know whether she has enough of her own power to be willing to do that.

When you see other women struggling, and you don't help them, we’re hurting everyone. Click To Tweet

That’s a woman who, I suppose, even if she doesn’t have a lot of her own money, would have enough to have a great life. Women stay in destructive and non-empowering relationships. I’m not just talking about the kind of non-empowering where you and your spouse fight or you’ve outlived a lot of some of the choices that you’ve made in being together in the first place. The kind of relationships where your life is in danger. Not you necessarily but I see this with women. In my coaching work, I have talked to many women who have been in that circumstance in the past before they found their own power and feelings of allowing themselves permission to get out of a destructive relationship.

It’s interesting to me to see how society tells us that we need to stay. Society tells us that we need to be stuck. I can’t tell you how many women who have left say one of the main reasons that they stayed was that their mothers told them that they had to. Their mothers said to them, “You married this person. Therefore, this is your obligation.” Go back if she had left or stay if she was thinking about leaving, even when she was being beaten or raped. This is women helping to perpetuate against other women inadvertently because you want the best for the other person but the way that you were raised is inside of a world that says that that’s still okay. To say to Melania Trump, “You have to weigh whether there’s more in it for you to stay or go.” That’s crazy to me.

YGA 15 | Sisterhood

Sisterhood: We, women, didn’t have an option to be anything else other than the woman behind the man for a really long time. Now, we do. Now we choose to be out there on our own to change everything about the way we show up because we get to pick ourselves first.

 

It was a very similar situation with Charles and Diana. If you’ve been watching The Crown, you’ve probably seen the episodes where Diana is expressing herself in a creative way. She’s expressing herself from the heart. All that happens with her husband is he feels marginalized and less than because she’s the one that’s out in front. His ego gets harmed. I, myself, was in a relationship for a long time where I thought I was happy being the woman behind the man. It was Eleanor Roosevelt who said that behind every great man, there’s a woman. It was, for sure, a choice that I was making. We, women, didn’t have an option to be anything else other than the woman behind the man for a long time. Now we do. We can choose to be out there on our own to change everything about the way that we show up because we get to pick ourselves first and our partners get added to that.

When I see women online who are shaming people who are making those choices, who are standing up and standing out and saying, “This isn’t okay.” Chrissy Teigen left Instagram because of all the trolling that she was receiving. It was not just from men. She’s married to this beautiful singer, John Legend. They have great kids. She’s beautiful and a former supermodel but now she’s got her own brand. She’s leaving a platform that would allow her a great deal of publicity and power because she’s tired of being told that she’s too fat, unattractive or not enough just as she is. Sisters, we need to begin to make choices to call out our own negative behavior.

When Meghan Markle makes choices, even if she’s making choices for herself and her husband, what’s wrong with that? Where do we come off saying that she doesn’t have the right to make those choices for her future family or for her current relationship with her husband? That power struggle that must be going on underneath of everything is too much to bear. Each of us has these options inside of our own current environment. There are compromises that I’m making to be in my relationship. There are compromises that you are making to be in your relationship or to be in a relationship with the other women in your life. When you see it happening, when you see other women in that struggle and you don’t help them, we’re hurting everyone. We’re not often aware of that because we don’t think of it that way. We’re hurting the overall sisterhood by not coming together and being there for each other regardless of skin color, class, background and whether that other woman is a stranger to you.

We're hurting the overall sisterhood by not coming together and being there for each other regardless of skin color, class, background. Click To Tweet

I want to encourage you to be there for each other. One of the ways that you can do that is to be there for yourself first. Imposter syndrome comes from the story that we tell ourselves that someone else has something that we don’t have and that we are not enough just as we are. That we are not enough and that we need that other thing or because of the way that we were raised with lack in our hearts because we were raised around poverty of some kind whether that’s money, poverty or love poverty or looks poverty, it doesn’t even matter. When we have a chance to look at other people and see that they have something that we want, we can draw that closer to us. Wouldn’t it be wonderful to know that when you see the Chrissy Teigens of the world who are in a love relationship or have the beauty of the looks, glamour or whatever that we say to ourselves, “Some of that for me, please. I am calling that energy closer to me,” as opposed to pushing it off.

I am bringing it in by saying, “Some of that for me, please.” That tells my higher power, the goddess, the universe, God, whatever your favorite word is that tells our higher power, “Putting you on notice, I’ll take that. I’ll take that too. I want that added to me.” When we say, “She has that and I don’t.” We’re sending that out into the universe instead. We’re saying to the universe, to the goddess, take your favorite word and substitute it for whatever it is that I’m saying. When we say that person has that and I don’t, that’s the message that we’re sending. I like to say God is literal and has no sense of humor so God’s like, “No problem. She has that and you don’t.” When that thing that we see in that other person triggers us when we get angry or upset, those are our triggers. When we feel bad because of that other person, those are our triggers.

When you have that trigger, recognize it, acknowledge it and say to yourself, “That’s me wishing that I had that thing and feeling that I have that imposter syndrome. I’m not that person yet. I want to be and I’m not. I wish that I had that and I don’t.” Choose instead the thought, “Some of that for me, please.” Allow that energy to come closer. Remember, at the highest level, we are all one and we are being invited to recognize that in our oneness, we do have that thing. That person is the way show or for us what is possible for us. What delicious feelings that will be when we see the Chrissy Teigens of the world, the Meghan Markles of the world, the Oprah Winfreys, Ali Browns or whatever it is that’s your personal shero.

We say, “I’m so excited because she has that. I can have it too. If she’s a bestselling author, I am a bestselling author. If she has multimillions of dollars, I have multimillions of dollars. If she has a happy home life with a partner that’s her beloved or children who adore her, I have that too.” If anybody has read NutriGlamorous, my new book, you’ve heard me talk about this or you’ve read it and seen it, we have this ability to say to ourselves, “Not just some of that for me, please,” but also that, “I get to have her energy as my energy. I am taking that on. I am accepting that for myself.”

That is so powerful because the universe wants that for you. God wants that for you. It’s such an opportunity. I feel so much joy talking about it because it erases imposter syndrome completely. It allows us to welcome something bigger and bigger for ourselves. What a great opportunity to say, “Whatever I see that she has that I want, I’m going to compliment her on it. I’m going to cheer her on, knowing that I can have that too.” That is a sisterhood that we can all get behind. I hope you’ve enjoyed this episode. I hope that you will choose to subscribe, like, follow and please get back to me with any comments. If there are any topics that you’d like me to address in future episodes, I would love to hear from you. All of my social profiles are public and I’d love to get a chance to interact with you. Until next time, blessings.